How do you dream when you can't fall asleep?

Life and all of her different directions...

Life is full of different avenues and streets.  I have traveled down many different streets that I never knew existed.
I leave for Las Vegas on Friday for the ARDA conference.  ARDA stands for the American Resort Development Association and this will be their annual conference.  This annual conference is the biggest in the resort industry.  I can't wait to network and meet so many new people.   We will be there for a week and staying at the Venetian.  I can't wait.

Israel...wow, what can I say? One of the most unbelieveable places I have ever been.  I pray that one day I will have another chance to go.  To be in the same place where Jesus spoke so many of His precious words.  It truly is God's country.  Standing at the Mt. of Beatitudes and overlooking the Sea of Galilee was breathtaking.  Other than me catching some sort of virus and having to have an Israeli doctor come to the hotel room and then my roommate for the week ending up in an Israeli hospital and having to have surgery, it was the trip of a lifetime.  I took over 2,000 pictures and none of them do it justice.  I do have a scar on my right leg from falling in the Dead Sea and scraping up my leg.  HAHA  It's a good reminder scar though.

To stand at the Garden of Gethsemane where Jesus prayed so hard that his tears turned to blood.  If we all just lived a life like His.

To stand in the pit that Jesus was lowered into after he was arrested in the Garden of Gethsemane.  The only way into the pit at that time, was to be lowered through a hole in the roof.
What a privelege.  I stood where Jesus spent his last night before being placed on the cross.
How did I ever get so lucky?

A lot of people have been asking me if I am okay with everything that has happened with me and Gregg.  To be honest, i'm completely fine.  There are some things in life that just don't work out.  This was one of them.  God is the author of love, the painter of wonder, and the creator of heaven.  Why would He not want people to be in love?  From day one, I just wanted to love him and be loved.  Why did it have to be a game?
This is the strongest I've ever been in my walk with God.  He doesn't understand that, because he didn't know me before I met him.  Anyone that knows me, knows the complete 180 that I have turned.  For that, I can thank him. Other than that, I dont need a constant reminder of the mistakes that we made.  God is about forgiveness, not about shame.

I'm going to be moving to Lexington, SC soon.  I can't wait.  I need a change in my life.  I'm getting pretty good at running away.  I like being single.  I like being my own person. My heart doesn't get broken that way.
How can we really plan on forever with someone?  Forever changes quite often.

I'm enjoying my life to the best of my ability.  Life is short.  Why spend life regretting everything?  I don't regret anything I've ever done in my life.  It has made me the person that I am today.  Accept it.  I cant change it.
My new favorite song is "Scratch" by Kendall Payne.  At first I just loved the melody of it and how soft it was.  Then I listened to the words.  A few days ago, this would have been my theme song.
Not anymore.  I'm taking back control of my life and the people who I want to be in it.  I dont need negativity in my life.  I don't need any unnecessary drama.  Life shouldn't be that hard.  Just let go and let God.  Give all of worries and cares to Him and you can never go wrong.  He will never lead you astray.

"Scratch" by Kendall Payne

it's a big girl world now
full of big girl things
and everyday i wish i was small

i've been counting on nothing
but he keeps giving me his word
and i'm tired of hearing myself speak
do you get weary? do you ever get weak?
how do you dream when you can't fall asleep?

i've been wondering what you're thinking
and if you like my dress tonight
would you still say you love me under this ordinary moonlight?
i'm so afraid of what you'd say

i'd like to know if you'd be open to starting over from scratch
i'd like to know if you'd be open to giving me a second chance

i used to think i was special
and only i have proved me wrong
i thought i could change the world with a song
but i have ended up in india
with no map to guide me home
strangest place i think i've ever been
and all this time i thought that we were friends
my stubborn will is learning to bend

i'd like to know if you'd be open to starting over from scratch
i'd like to know if you'd be open to giving me a second chance

it's a big girl world now
full of big girl things
and everyday i wish i was small 

Tweet

Read more »

What if?

I first read this a few years ago and it has stuck with me ever since.  


What if you had a partner, that loved you more than life?
One whose only focus, was to have you for his wife.
What if this person gave you every flower in the land,
Would you then consider, giving him your hand?

What if you had a partner, that painted rainbows in the sky?
Just to see you smile for him, and draw your spirit nigh.
What if this person sent you the sweetest songs you've ever heard?
Wooing softly at your window, in the lovesong of a bird.

What if you had a partner, that could warm you like the sun,
And love you like no other, do you think he'd be the one?
What if this person prayed for you, each and every day,
And kept you ever close to him, to marvel at your ways.

What if you had a partner, that could meet your every need?
Just because he loves you, in thought and word and deed.
What if this person could create nature in it's glory,
To keep you ever happy, and fill your days with joy.

What if this person loved you, so much that he would die,
Just because he could not bear to ever say goodbye.
What if you had a partner that only longs for you?
And never strays away, because his love is true.

What if this isn't just a dream, or thoughts to fill your head,
But His Precious Name is Jesus, and this is what He said.
I will never leave you or forsake you, will you be my wife?
Marry me, My Bride, for I've loved you all your life.


-Unknown

Tweet

Read more »

You don't have to go it alone...

Well I found out yesterday that instead of coming back to the U.S. from Israel on March 8, we are going to be going to Greece and then finally coming home on March 15th.  I can't believe it!  And I also can't wait.  I can't wait to see the beauty that God has created in this world.  There is so much bad stuff all over the tv and the internet and the news.  Has anyone ever just stopped and said "Wow, look at all the beauty that God has provided for us.  Why are we tearing it apart?"

There is so much potential for love in this world that it is unimagineable.  How is that possible, you ask.  It's because God loves us.  John 3:16 says "For God so loved the world that He gave his begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have ever lasting life."

Amazing.

Jesus died for US!  Not just for me, not just for you, but for everyone!  He sacrificed his own self so that our entire world would not have to pay for our sins.  Jesus paid the price for us.  How can it get any better?
I have a hard enough time trying to figure out my own problems.  Why not just give them to God.  Let him take control of my life.  We don't have to worry, he does the worrying for us.  Can you believe that worrying is actually a sin?  It's because when we worry, we aren't giving it all to God.  He will work it out.  If it's in God's will for our life, He will work it out for us.  If it's not in His will for us, then like flour through a sifter, he will get rid of the impurities for us.  Why should we worry about life's imperfections?  There is someone who will take care of this for us.  He is God.  Do you want God to be your heavenly father or do you want God to be your judge?
When it is my time to leave this earth, I want to be welcomed by God with open arms.  I want him to look at me and say "Welcome home, my child.  Welcome home."

God has gotten me through so many emotions in the past month.  He hears my prayers.  He knows my heart.  He has given me comfort and peace.  I am so thankful that I have not been alone in this time of my life.  He is always with me.

It's time to get on with my life and see what God has in store for me.  I can't keep holding onto "what ifs."  What if those "what ifs" don't ever come around.  Then that is time wasted that could have been spent being productive for God.

I have learned that a woman doesn't become a woman when she turns a certain age, or when she marries, or when she has children.  A woman becomes a woman when she becomes what God wants her to be.  When a woman becomes what God wants her to be, then her role as a wife and as a mother will be perfect.  God will have molded her and made her into the woman that He wanted her to be.  Not a woman that someone else wanted her to be.

It's now 3:51 a.m.  I have been awake for an hour with endless thoughts running through my mind.
God, I'm giving it all to you.  You know the answers.  You know the heartache.  Lord, continue to give me peace and comfort in my time and need.  Be with everyone tonight and just touch their hearts.  Let their heart know the peace of God that I have come to know.  Keep your hand on my daddy as he lies in the hospital battling pneumonia in both lungs.  I desperately wish I could be there by his bedside.   Thank you, Lord, for all that you have given me in my life.  I could never repay you.

You don't have to go it alone

There are days when you stagger
and days when you fall,
and days when you can't seem
to stand up at all.

But you don't have to go it alone.
You don't have to carry the load.
You can give it to Jesus at the side of the road
You don't have to go it alone.

There are days when your heartbreak
is too much to bear
and days when you're too hurt
to offer a prayer.

But you don't have to go it alone.
You don't have to dry your own tears,
You can give them to Jesus along with your fears.
You don't have to go it alone.

Cause there's power in the blood
and true love from the cross
a companion for everyone
who's ever felt lost.

There's more healing and comfort
than you've ever known,
You don't have to go it alone.

Tweet

Read more »

It's like the breath of Jesus is right here in this room...

Well I'm officially single now.  What a ride.  I loved him.  I still love him.  Fifteen months is a long time to be with someone and not still love him. Will we ever be together again?  Who knows.  Only God knows. This relationship has definitely opened my eyes.  I truly believe that people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime.  We never know at the time how long they will be in our lives, but they are always put there for a reason.  I believe I am exactly where God wants me to be.  There is a reason I am where I am.  I'm not sure yet what that is, but I can't wait to find out.  Something that is helping me get through this is Jeremiah 29:12&13.  "Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.  And ye shall see me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart."  Wow, those are some powerful words.  If I seek God with all of my heart, I will find him.  He doesn't have to find me.  He already loves me.  It is I who needs to do the searching.  Do I want Jesus walking behind me or do I want him walking beside me?  I need Him every step of the way.  Keep me in your prayers...

I'm heading to Israel for 11 days next month.  Our trip is from February 27-March 8.  I absolutely can not wait.  I love the lyrics of "Better Hands Now" by Natalie Grant because they are so true.  The line that says "It's like the breath of Jesus is right here in this room," is absolutely amazing.  It's so true.  I'm going to be in the same places that Jesus was.  I'm going to feel the air that Jesus breathed.  I can't wait to go to Israel and experience things that Christ experienced.  I will be walking where Jesus walked. 

Day 1 – Departure

We travel from Atlanta to Tel Aviv

Day 2 – Israel

Upon arrival, we will receive an overview and instructions as we travel to our hotel for unpacking, dinner, and devotions on the beautiful Mediterranean Sea.  Day 3 we will be walking where Jesus walked.

Day 3 – Caesarea, Megiddo, and Jordan River Baptism Site

After breakfast, we travel by private motor coach along the coast of the Mediterranean Sea to Caesarea, where gentiles first heard the Good News from Peter and were baptized.  See the Roman Amphitheatre and aqueduct.  Then we will journey to Mt. Carmel, where Elijah hid from King Ahab and through the Jezreal Valley to Megiddo, where archaeologists have unearthed 20 levels of civilization.  We conclude our day with a visit to the Jordan River Baptismal site.  We will have dinner and overnight lodging for the next two nights in the Tiberias area on the Sea of Galilee.

Day 4 – Capernaum, Dan Caesarea Philippi, and Mount of Beatitudes

Following breakfast, our morning travels take us to the Dan and Caesarea Philippi, site of Peter's Confession.  In Capernaum, we will visit the ruins of an ancient synagogue and Peter's home.  Then we travel to the site of the multiplications of loaves and fishes and the Mount of Beatitudes overlooking the Sea where Jesus gave his "Sermon on the Mount."  A relaxing cruise on the Sea of Galilee with east viewing of the nearby Golan Heights brings to life the experience of the fisherman disciples and a conclusion to a wonderful day.

Day 5 – Nazareth, Biet-Shean, and the Dead Sea

We begin the day with a visit to Mt. Arbel for a panoramic view of the Sea of Galilee and surrounding lands.  From this overview, we will be able to have a valuable lesson in geographic layout of Jesus' early ministry.  We continue on through the area of Cana and Nazareth, the boyhood home of Jesus, where we visit the Nazareth Village – a wonderful recreation of Biblical times with costumed guides.  Next, we travel southward to Biet-Shean/Scythopolis, the most significant archeological site in Israel, located at the strategic juncture of the Jezreel and Jordan valleys.  Like Jericho, it has been almost continuously occupied throughout history.    During the intertestamental period, the city was renamed the "Scythopolis."  Archaeologists have uncovered a huge number of ruins of the Roman/Byzantine Scythopolis.  During the time of Jesus, Scythopolis was one of the chief cities of the Decapolis – a league of ten cities sharing Greek culture and government.  As we travel along, we will view the oldest city in the world – Jericho, before coming to the Dead Sea.  We will be spending time in the special spa and enjoy a dip in the Dead Sea for a relaxing float before turning to the hotel.

Day 6 – Masada, Dead Sea Scrolls, Ein Gedi

Our day begins with a cable car ride to the mountain top fortress of Masada.  Here our guide will treat us to the history of the famous zealot stand.  We will visit Qumran Caves, where the Dead Sea Scrolls were discovered.  Afterwards, we will proceed to Ein Gedi, "Spring of the Goat," an oasis on the western shore of the Dead Sea.  Because of its warm climate and abundant supply of water, the site developed a reputation for its fragrant plans and date palm groves.  This is where King David hid from Saul, and where God defeated the Israelites by praise and worship led by King Jehoshaphat (1 Samuel 23:29; Song of Songs 1:14.)  Our lodging will be in Jerusalem.

Day 7 – Jesus' steps, The Last Days

Today we walk where Jesus walked.  Begin the day with a panoramic view of the city, Mount Moriah and the Dome of the Rock from atop the Mount of Olives and then the Garden of Gethsemane.  How many have wished to be whisked back in time to get a glimpse of our Lord or hear His voice if only for a moment?  To walk between the ancient olive trees, read the scriptures of Jesus' prayer, and taking time for personal reflection is important here.  Next we visit the house of Caiaphas and the "Upper Room" where the disciple, whom Jesus loved, laid his head on His breast and where later Thomas cried, "My Lord and God."  From here we will see the ancient Roam Cardo, Arab marketplace, Herodian Mansion, Temple Institute and Western Wall. 

Day 8 – Around Jerusalem, Bible Times

An interesting and educational day of touring awaits us today beginning at the Israeli Museum.  We will walk through collections of centuries old Israeli artifacts including the Dead Sea Scrolls, and a guided walk through an accurately detailed model of Biblical Jerusalem.  Next, we will visit the South Wall Excavations.  This southern side of the Temple was the main entrance for the common folk, whereas the Priests and Levites had their own entrance from the higher, eastern side.  Parts of the giant stairs, which led to the Temple Mount from the courtyard, have been unearthed.  It is in this courtyard that Jesus likely drove out the vendors and money exchangers who were exploiting people.  It is also likely that this is the place where Peter stood and preached and where thousands were saved and baptized.  On our way out of the city we will visit the Wailing Wall and then the fascinating Rabbinical Tunnels leading us through the Second Temple era.

Day 9 – Holocaust Museum, Way of Suffering, Garden Tomb

We will take time this day to visit the Children's Exhibit of the Holocaust Museum before we enter the old city through Stephen's Gate and visit the pool of Bethesda where Jesus cured a cripple.  We will move onto the judgment Hall of Pilate, hear of those who conspired against Him and are reminded of His brutal beating and humiliation.  While walking along the Via Dolorosa, we are reminded of His way of suffering, view the Church of the Sepulcher before we arrive at the climax of our tour – The Garden Tomb.  Your faith in, that blessed hope and communion with Christ, will take on a new meaning.

Day 10 – Reflection

A day of reflection, revisiting special sights, shopping on our own and going back to the airport for an overnight flight.

Day 11 – Return home

We return home via Atlanta.

As I sit here and reread the itinerary that we will be doing in Israel, the same verse keeps popping into my head.  "Be still and know that I am God." (Psalm 46:10)  I can't wait to just take everything in and feel the spirit of Jesus all around me. 

I am currently reading "No Wonder They Call Him The Savior" by Max Lucado.  Wow.  That's all I can say.  Talk about putting things into perspective.  There is an excerpt that says "If it is true that a picture paints a thousand words, then there was a Roman centurion who got a dictionary full.  All he did was see Jesus suffer.  He never heard him preach or saw him heal or followed him through the crowds.  He never witnessed him still the wind; he only witnessed the way he died.   But that was all it took to cause this weather-worn soldier to take a giant step in faith, saying, "Surely this was a righteous man." (Luke 23:47)

If only we could learn from this. 

He is God.  He is our Father.  We are his children.  "And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." (Matthew 28:20)

Tweet

Read more »

Better hands now...

This has been a hard hard month...When I said I was ready to be tested in 2008, I didnt know how soon that test would come.  God has a plan for me and I can't wait.  I am fine and I will be fine.

Better Hands Now
It's hard to stand on shifting sand
It's hard to shine in the shadows of the night
You can't be free if you don't reach for help
You cant love if you dont love yourself

There is hope when my faith runs out
Cause I'm in better hands now


It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now

I am strong all because of you
I stand in awe of every mountain that you move
Oh I am changed, yesterday is gone
I am safe from this moment on

There's no fear when the night comes 'round
I'm in better hands now

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now

It's like the sun is shining when the rain is pouring down
It's like my soul is flying though my feet are on the ground
Its like the world is silent though I know it isnt true
Its like the breath of Jesus is right here in this room

So take this heart of mine there's no doubt
I'm in better hands now
I'm in better hands now

Tweet

Read more »

I am me...

Tiffany - ..t(i)-ffa-ny.. is pronounced TIF-a-nee. It is of Greek origin, and its meaning is "revelation of God".
I am the reflection of our Great Creator within me. I am the rich, deep roots of my ancestors' legacy and story. I am the past, present, and future of knowledge. I am living, learning, growing. I am simply me, spirit in human experience embracing and remembering all of me. I am love made visible. I am one of the colors of God's heart given form so that love can be seen by all. I am an expression of a divine idea that no one who has lived, living or will live can ever be. I am a universe unto myself. I am a light that lights the path for you on your sojourn here. Loving life, respecting life, sharing life. That's me.

It's finally 2008.  Too many resolutions, not enough time...

I am happy....

Today starts a new year and a new me.  I will overcome obstacles that have not yet been placed in my way.  But they will.  Time tests us all.

 I'm ready for the test....

Tweet

Read more »